instead of sleeping and forgetting,
forgiving,
i'm wide awake.
Wishing.
i wish God was huggable,
i wish he felt warm
and safe.
i wish i was strong.
i wish i didn't need to be.
i wish i had a big enough heart to
never
run out
i wish i could run really fast
really long
and not get tired.
i wish i wasn't tired all the time
i wish i wasn't tired of running.
i wish i was away,
i wish i didn't want to be.
i wish i had enough answers to spare
and give them out to
anyone.
i wish for someone.
i wish there weren't lies
or moments to need them.
i wish i needed You
more.
i wish the state i'm in
had come sooner.
i wish i wasn't so late
all the time.
i wish time could freeze
for everyone
but me.
i wish then that i'd catch up,
i wish to catch my breath,
and stop the gasps.
i wish trust wasn't scary
and faith grew on trees.
i wish for respect
and honor
and the ignorance of pain.
i wish for nievity
and responsibility.
i wish to cry
beautiful tears
and never
never
stop them with
guilt.
i wish to wake up
rested
and not need the extra
energy.
i wish to never be like the
rest.
i wish for leaner arms
smaller eyes
a lack of stomach
and a spirit where
none of that would
matter.
i wish You mattered.