- Its almost 2012. (thank God)
- Today I got the red chunk of hair I've wanted since last February.
- I've gone to Best Buy 3 times to get my Canon Rebel T2i, none of which ended with me walking out of the store with the camera.
- I'm gonna be a famous photographer.
- I really like the people I work with. I wish I could take them to Chatnooga with me.
- I'm moving to Chatnooga. SOON.
- People from Chattanooga really say it "Chatnooga".
- IT WAS ME. (this has to do with a really great story that i will tell anyone that asks)
- the more shopping I do, the more I just want to wear black, white, and grey the rest of my life.
- This will be the first year in my entire life that I have no clue what to expect. This scares me.
- I now have an Airline credit card. I am an idiot.
- Someday I'm gonna start a clothing line based on girls want to dress "appropriately slutty".
- I graduated 8 months ago.
- Also, holy crap.
- I started watching American Horror Story. I'm starting to feel how I did when me and emily had a Nip/Tuck marathon.
- For the life of me, I don't know how to having a savings account.
- I'm really/only good at dressing other people.
- I hate retail.
- I'm a real woman now because I wear red lipstick..
- Apparently 22 is the exact age you become cynical.
- I have the greatest sister in the world!
you know i'm in trouble when its the middle of the day
and i'm writing.
the thing is that today really sucks.
like yesterday did,
and the day before.
between:
horrible dreams
embarrassing grudges
growing distances
money that won't show
work i'd rather die on the way to
and the looming cloud that is my future
it's all a bit dark over here.
and i know that life's not fair
and that i am severely blessed.
i have nothing to complain about that i probably
can't fix myself
but really
i just need something.
anything.
that makes it come a little closer
if nothing else,
to making sense.
and i'm writing.
the thing is that today really sucks.
like yesterday did,
and the day before.
between:
horrible dreams
embarrassing grudges
growing distances
money that won't show
work i'd rather die on the way to
and the looming cloud that is my future
it's all a bit dark over here.
and i know that life's not fair
and that i am severely blessed.
i have nothing to complain about that i probably
can't fix myself
but really
i just need something.
anything.
that makes it come a little closer
if nothing else,
to making sense.
Here's to milestones.
and to people coming here to see what i have to say.
i'm dying to know who you are. seriously.
Make a decision. The direction does not matter so long as you are moving.
And for that matter, moving fast.
And for that matter, moving fast.
Tony. Amy. Body. Soul.
(I belonged in another time)
isn't ever what it seems.
it's not an "i'm sorry" that rises above decades of similar apologies.
it's not one day of drinking your body weight in water,
or applying your new acne treatment to wake up free of insecurities.
it's not one treacherous ride on a treadmill.
it's not one google search, one job application, one resume submission.
it's not one "no" among the company of "just one more" 's.
it's not the time to stop and adjust.
it isn't disposable,
a one-time action to counteract habits of atomic proportions.
it isn't reckless,
or careful.
No.
Change is not what we most treasure
(or even like.)
it is the outcome of what we let ourselves settle for.
it is the sum of strides towards what we deserve.
you fight to hold on.
you fight to let go.
you can either wish to go back to summer,
or not let it find you the same.
it's not an "i'm sorry" that rises above decades of similar apologies.
it's not one day of drinking your body weight in water,
or applying your new acne treatment to wake up free of insecurities.
it's not one treacherous ride on a treadmill.
it's not one google search, one job application, one resume submission.
it's not one "no" among the company of "just one more" 's.
it's not the time to stop and adjust.
it isn't disposable,
a one-time action to counteract habits of atomic proportions.
it keeps you up at night.
it nags and bites and hurts and tires.it isn't reckless,
or careful.
and it isn't cheap--
as most things we want to change from fail in comparison to what we could have
accomplished
had we taken the road more
valuable.No.
Change is not what we most treasure
(or even like.)
it is the outcome of what we let ourselves settle for.
it is the sum of strides towards what we deserve.
you fight to hold on.
you fight to let go.
you can either wish to go back to summer,
or not let it find you the same.
this song changed things for me when i was....14.
in honor of my visit to the motherland this week, this is just a sample of the genius that is:argentine tango.
